Sunday, February 12, 2012

Rest in Me says the Lord

This has truly been what the Lord has been telling me recently! We found out on Monday that our 5th IUI did not work. It was harder this time because with the shots and the EIGHT follicles, I thought for sure this would work! But, it didn't. So, after tears and prayers (and a big glass of wine!) :) Todd and I remembered that Gods plans are not our plans and His ways are not our ways and His timing (unfortunately) is not our timing! So, I went back to the doctor on Tuesday for more bloodwork. On the way to the doctor my mom called. She is one of the rocks of my life, and when mamma is concerned, it's time to get concerned! Mom told me that she felt this medicine was effecting me, even though I didn't think it was. She told me that it was okay to take a break and focus on Todd and myself! Of course, I cried and cried. I got very defensive and told her I WAS NOT TAKING A BREAK.I think God was just laughing at my temper tantrum!I say that because I get to the doctors office in Montgomery and we do more bloodwork (4th time in one week!) and an unltrasound. We found out that I had some very large cysts and we would not be able to do anything this month,or until the cysts went away. What was that, Rachel? When the nurse told me we had to wait until March, I was upset but at the same time God whispered, rest in Me!!! Since Tuesday, I have been at complete rest in our situation! It was as if God said, be still My child! What a relief to be able to fully rest in the arms on the Lord! T and I have some major life changing decisions to make this month and it is kind of nice to not worry about shots, doctors appointments, or anything else during this time. We are just praying that come March 6th, all is clear and we get start again fo IUI number 6! Gods timing is not our timing. I appreciate that sometimes, God let's us have our little temper tantrums and then settles our souls like we could never imagine! I am so glad His grace is sufficient, even for me!